cried with vexation and disappointment。 Why had he gone? Why
couldnt he e back now? Why was it such a battle between
them? She loved him……she did love him……why couldnt he
be kinder to her; nicer to her?
She waited in distress……then her mood grew harder。 He
passed out of her thoughts。 She had considered indignantly; what
right he had to interfere with her sewing? She had indignantly
refuted his right to interfere with her at all。 She was not to
be interfered with。 Was she not herself; and he the
outsider。
Yet a quiver of fear went through her。 If he should leave
her? She sat conjuring fears and sufferings; till she wept with
very self…pity。 She did not know what she would do if he left
her; or if he turned against her。 The thought of it chilled her;
made her desolate and hard。 And against him; the stranger; the
outsider; the being who wanted to arrogate authority; she
remained steadily fortified。 Was she not herself? How could one
who was not of her own kind presume with authority? She knew she
was immutable; unchangeable; she was not afraid for her own
being。 She was only afraid of all that was not herself。 It
pressed round her; it came to her and took part in her; in form
of her man; this vast; resounding; alien world which was not
herself。 And he had so many weapons; he might strike from so
many sides。
When he came in at the door; his heart was blazed with pity
and tenderness; she looked so lost and forlorn and young。 She
glanced up; afraid。 And she was surprised to see him;
shining…faced; clear and beautiful in his movements; as if he
were clarified。 And a startled pang of fear; and shame of
herself went through her。
They waited for each other to speak。
〃Do you want to eat anything?〃 she said。
〃Ill get it myself;〃 he answered; not wanting her to serve
him。 But she brought out food。 And it pleased him she did it for
him。 He was again a bright lord。
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